我看着窗外 I'm looking out the window,
窗外车水马龙 and the trucks won't stop coming.
我叫安德亚 . 沙恩德 My name is Andrea Schaund.
我住在金斯敦 希泰路 176号 I live at 176 Hillside Terrace, Kingston.
我丈夫因为工作平日不在家 My husband's out of the house on weekdays
早上八点出门 晚上七点回家 between 8:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m.,
所以见面是安全的 so it's safe to meet then.
但是我有两个孩子在4点回家 But I have two children who come home at 4:00,
我不希望他们受到伤害 and I don't want them to get hurt.
如果我离开 他肯定会伤害他们的 He'll hurt them, if I leave.
我们现在开始 We're gonna kick off
乳液系列鱼尾纹化妆教程 this liquid latex series with a crow's-feet tutorial.
画鱼尾纹是很好的 Making crow's-feet is a great introduction
去皱纹入门课 to wrinkle stippling,
这是我最喜欢的杠衰老技法之一 which is one of my favorite aging techniques.
这方法不需要你花很多钱 You don't need to spend a ton of money to do this.
我使用的乳液 大概只需6美元 The latex I'll be using goes for about six dollars
在万圣节商店搞活动时就能买到 at Halloween stores, and you can get about...
我妻子没告诉我... The wife failed to inform me...
说今天有保险医疗 the insurance medical was booked for today.
请快点 Make it quick.
你好 沙恩德先生 Hello, Mr. Schaund.
今天你有三件事要做 Today you will do the following three things.
1.把这个房子签字 移交给你妻子 You will sign this house over to your wife.
2.你将转移75%的财产 You will transfer 75% of your funds
到她名下的银行账户 to a bank account in her name.
3.然后离开 And you will leave,
永不回来 for good.
你到底是谁？ Who the hell are you?
沙恩德先生 你理解并同意这三件事吗 Do you understand and agree to these things, Mr. Schaund?
你是律师吗？ Are you a lawyer?
我知道你对她做了什么 沙恩德先生 I know what you do to her, Mr. Schaund,
也知道如果她离开 你会对孩子们做些什么 and what you'll do to the kids if she leaves.
二十三万七千…… Two hundred and thirty-seven thousand...
四百六十五美元 four hundred and sixty-five dollars.
感谢您致电 Thanks for calling
CSO安保公司 有什么我可以帮你的吗 CSO Security, how may I help you?
请转接人力资源部 玛格丽特.特纳 Margaret Turner, Human Resources, please.
-你好？-玛格丽特 - Hello? - Margaret.
我是财务部的迈克尔.沙恩德 This is Michael Schaund, from Finance.
抱歉 你是谁？ Sorry, who?
迈克尔 Michael...
沙恩德 Schaund.
好的 我现在不方便讲话 请稍后再来电 Okay, I can't talk right now. You'll have to call back.
不 不 这事刻不容缓 No, no, this can't wait.
我要辞职了 I'm resigning.
如果你骚扰她 或孩子们 If you bother her, or the kids,
或者他们认识的任何人 以任何方式 or anyone they know, in any way,
我会杀了你 I will kill you.
我也想杀了你 I want to kill you.
拿上你的东西 Get your stuff.
所以 我就... So, I just...
我就告诉别人他离开了我？ I just tell people he left me?
嗯 就说找小三去了 Mm-hm. For another woman.
没人会怀疑的 No one will question it.
继续去互助组 会有帮助的 Keep going to Group, it'll help.
除了不要提起我 其他都可以说 You can be honest about everything except me.
我可以转递你的详细资料吗 Can I pass on your details?
如果有人真的需要 就可以 If someone really needs it.
我不能保证及时到 至少目前不行 I can't promise to come in time, not yet at least.
谢谢 Thank you.
我的钱呢 And do you have my note?
哦 对 Oh. Uh...
如果我的号码换了 我会告诉你 If my number changes, I'll let you know.
谢谢 Thank you.
照顾好自己 Take care of yourself.
我会的 I am.
以帕迪.帕拉作为笔名 他的书 In Paddy Pallin's name for his book,
《永不迷失》 Never Truly Lost,
只是暂时地 地理上懵圈了而已 just geographically, temporarily dislocated.
好吧 我16岁时遇见了他 Well, I met him at 16 years old.
17岁时生了一个女儿 I had a daughter at the age of 17.
我和他一起住在他母亲的家里 I moved in with him, at his mother's house.
一切都很好 直到一年后 Everything was fine until like a year later,
我开始被家暴 I started getting punched.
我没管 I left it alone,
也没离开 也没有报警 never walked away, never called the cops.
后来他就习惯性的虐待我 It started getting... He started getting used to abusing of me,
因为他看到我从来不向别人求助 because he saw I wasn't calling no one for help or anything.
我当初没有管这些 因为年轻懵懂 沉溺爱河 I left it alone because I was young and in love,
直到不久之前 until not too long ago.
我儿子三岁了... My son was three...
我外出做家政 那是一个星期天 I was at home working, it was a Sunday.
我回到家 我儿子跑到我面前哭 I got home, and my son ran to me crying,
说他爸爸打了他 telling me his father beat him.
当我检查时 发现他身上全是伤 When I checked the baby, he had marks all over his body,
他拎着USB线抽孩子 from a USB plug that he abused of him.
我去质问他 他什么也没说 I went to confront him about it, he didn't say anything about it.
我报了警 I called 911.
那是我第一次报警 That was the first time I ever called the cops on him.
他虐待我的时候 我从来没有报过警 I never called them when he abused of me,
但是一旦牵扯到孩子 我决不能忍受 but once it got to my kids, I wasn't gonna let it happen.
他们把我送进了家暴收容所…… Which they sent me into a domestic violence shelter...
即使我去了收容所 Even though I went into the shelter,
我还是打算回去找他 I was still planning on going back to him.
因为我第一次见到他时才16岁 所以那就像是 Because I was 16 when I first met him, so it was like,
我只有他 that's all I knew, was him.
我在收容所 结识了新朋友 So, I started meeting new people in the shelter,
还进了咨询小组 going into counseling groups,
让我去倾听别人的故事 just let me hearing other people's stories,
我进组后 感觉自己 and I felt like I had support
得到了所有人的支持 by other people once I got in there.
直到今天 我选择不回去 And to this day, I choose not to go.
和我的两个孩子单独住在一起 I'm still with my two kids, on my own...
海底很黑暗 The sea bed is dark,
可能有鲨鱼 and the sharks there may be,
但最让女性害怕的是 镜妖 but what scares the women most, is Tomokazuki,
就是在海洋深处看到自己的镜像 a mirror image of themselves they see in the ocean deep.
镜像会向你招手 说 The mirage will beckon you, saying,
“跟我来吧 到远处去 ” "Come with me, come further.
我会给你更多的鲍鱼 ” I'll give you more abalone."
但如果你跟着她 你将永远回不来了 But if you follow her, you will never come back.
或许这难以接受 It can be so very hard to accept
一个如此亲近的人 that someone so close to you,
一个本应该爱你的人 someone who's supposed to love you,
却残酷地控制你 can brutalize and control you.
那种残暴 控制 令人心生厌恶 That brutality, that control starts to breed worthlessness,
那种不见天日的感觉 and that feeling that you can't do any better.
有时 我们的那种感觉 And sometimes, we do. We get that feeling that...
离开的感觉 We can go.
我们得离开那里 想走就走 We gotta get up outta there. If we wanna go, we can go!
然后我们会感到害怕 And then we get scared.
开始觉得无法逃脱 Start to feel like there's no escape.
你很困惑 不知道什么是真实的 什么是不真实的 You're confused and not know what's real and what's not real.
我们的内心一息尚存 And there's something, there's something inside of us,
我们知道 就在内心 something that we know is down there,
这些我们全都知道 and we recognize it, we all do.
这就是我们来这的原因 我们认识到我们还有价值 That's how we got here. We recognize that we have value.
我们伸出手去 And we reached up and we reached out
获取帮助 and we got some help.
获得自由 然后离开 And we grabbed that freedom and got outta there.
这才是真实的 That's what's real.
最真实的 That's real.
我看着窗外 I'm looking out the window
窗外车水马龙 and the trucks won't stop coming.
我叫莎琳 杰克逊 My name is Charlene Jackson.
我住在格罗普斯维尔 斯科门路98号 I live at 98 Scomen Road, Gloversville.
一个陌生人的电话打来 He let me come to the store with him,
让我跟他一起去商店 this is a stranger's phone.
我要走了 I gotta go.
各位 下次再见 ...everybody, and I will see you next time.
照顾好自己 拜 Take care. Bye-bye.
嘿 伙计们 昨晚我看了《娃娃谷》 Hey, guys, last night, I watched Valley of the Doll,
娃娃谷：1967年由导演 马克·罗布森 执导的爱情音乐电影
于是我想好了第二天的计划 and I was, like, I have to do something like that tomorrow.
我喜欢她们的妆容 所以我... I love all their makeup, so I did a more...
嗯...其中一个很不错 Um... One of the more dramatic looks from it.
所以 如果你想看的话 请继续关注 So, if you like what you see, stay tuned.
操 Fuck you!
你要去哪？ Where are you gonna go?
去温暖的地方 Somewhere warm.
我不知道 也许是去迈阿密 I don't know. Miami, maybe.
他自认为有爱就有恨 It's like all his hate makes his love worth it.
因为我们必须要抗争 Because we really had to fight for it.
这是一场可以放弃的抗争 This is one fight it's okay to give up on.
好吧 不管你去哪 Well, wherever you go,
你最好找一个新的互助组 you better find a new support group.
好 Yeah.
让我再多给你一些现金 Let me give you some more cash.
我不喜欢现金 I hate that I have to take it at all.
我能帮你什么吗？ What can I get for you?
威士忌 加冰 Well, whiskey on the rocks.
四块钱 Four bucks.
你一个人？ You're alone?
对 Yep.
我在哪里能赚到我的40%？ Where can I get 40%?
只是来喝一杯 Just here for a drink.
嘿 回来吧 我请你喝一杯 Hey, come back inside, let me buy you a drink.
不了 谢谢 No, thanks.
没有下一次 Don't do that again.
我看着窗外 I'm looking out the window,
窗外车水马龙 and the trucks won't stop coming.
我是乔伊斯 理查兹 你在三月份帮过我 This is Joyce Richards. You helped me in March.
这次不是为我 I'm not calling for me.
我打电话是因为我朋友的邻居 I'm calling because of my friend's neighbor,
我觉得那里的孩子真的需要帮助 I think the kid there really needs help.
如果你在镇上 能去看看孩子吗 If you're in town, can you check on him?
地址是少女巷87740 The address is 87740 Maiden Lane...
你想干什么 What do you want?
你需要帮助吗 Do you need some help?
你有预约吗 Do you have an appointment?
不 我…… No, I...
我在我店里见过你 I saw you at the store and I...
我认为你可能需要一些帮助 I thought you might need some help.
我妈妈不会让我弟弟离开他的房间的 My mom won't let my brother out of his room.
他在里面 He's in there.
那个卫生间的门里面有锁吗 Does that bathroom door have a lock on the inside?
好 我要你进去后把门锁上 Good, I want you to go inside and lock the door.
你要揍她吗 Are you going to hurt her?
你和你弟弟是不是想离开她 Do you want me to get you and your brother away from her?
好的 Okay.
你他妈的要干什么 What the fuck are you...
放开我 Get the fuck off me!
钥匙在哪里 Where's the key?
-你最好不要 -钥匙在哪里 - You don't want this... - Where's the key?
放开我 Get the fuck off me!
你叫什么名字 What's your name?
赛迪 Sadie.
你叫什么 What's yours?
扎克 Zach.
你弟弟呢 And your brother?
他叫莱昂 He's Leon.
扎克 Zach.
警察马上就来 The police are gonna come now,
还有儿童机构的人 with someone from Child Services.
他们会带你和莱昂 And they're gonna take you and Leon
远离你妈妈 away from your mom.
这可能有点不适应 It might be a little scary.
很多陌生人会询问你们 A lot of strangers asking questions,
但这样才能保证你们的安全 but this is your chance for you guys to be safe.
我们不能跟你一起走吗 Can't we just come with you?
我得走了 I have to go.
你们跟着我不安全 You wouldn't be safe with me.
如果有人伤害了你 或莱昂 If anyone ever hurts you, or Leon,
你就去告诉别人 you tell someone.
知道的人越多越好 You tell as many people as you can.
如果没有人帮助你…… If no one helps you...
打这个电话 You call this number here,
我会帮助你的 and I will help you.
好的 Okay.
另外不要... And don't...
不要告诉任何人我的真实姓名 Don't tell anyone my real name.
离开之时
我知道这是他的弱点 但他真的爱我 I know it's his weakness but he really loves me,
没人会这样爱我 like nobody, like, no one will.
嘿 Hey,
这是起点 it's ground zero.
从头开始很难 但却是好事 It's hard starting from scratch, but it's good.
我现在管住了 我和我的孩子 I have control over me and my kids now.
按照我的意愿 It's my will.
而不是他的 Not his.
我的意愿改变不了什么 My will can't change anything.
为什么这么说 赛迪 What makes you say that, Sadie?
因为就是这样 'Cause it's true.
你能和我们分享你的故事吗 Can you share your leaving story with us?
我们经常去野营旅行 We went on camping trips a lot.
“我们”是谁 Who's "We"?
我 我丈夫和我们的儿子 科迪 Me, my husband and our son, Cody.
是怎么样的野营 What were the trips like?
生存露营 Survivalist camping. It's...
我们徒步跋涉到森林 建造自己的避难所 We'd trek into the woods, build our own shelter,
自己觅食 寻药 hunt and forage for food, do our own first aid.
他会... He would...
替我接骨 set my bones.
在他打断了你的骨头之后 After he broke them.
因为我违反了规则 When I broke the rules.
不过 他从未当着科迪的面 He never did it in front of Cody, though.
他从不当着我儿子的面打我 He never hurt me in front of him.
而我总是用化妆来掩饰一切 And I always used makeup to cover anything.
我们保护了他 And we protected him.
你告诉过别人吗？ Did you tell anyone?
你的朋友 家人 说关于虐待的事？ Your friends, family, about the abuse?
没有 我…… No, I...
我们结婚后 离开了父母 When we got married, we moved away from my parents,
周游全国各地 我当时很高兴 我… across the country. And I was glad. I...
我也没有朋友 I don't have any friends.
如果我想交朋友 If I wanted to socialize,
就没足够的钱解决科迪的伙食费 the money came out of Cody's food budget,
所以我没有出门 so I just didn't go out.
我被禁止工作 And I wasn't allowed to work.
因为那是丈夫该干的 Because that's a husband's role.
我是一个好妻子 I was a very good wife.
你跟他在一起多久了？ How long were you with him?
大约十年 About ten years.
你为什么离开 What made you leave?
那天他很早回家 He came home early.
就在科迪放学回家后 Right after Cody got home from school.
他很兴奋 He was excited.
车道上有一辆新车 There was a new truck in the driveway,
挂在我们的野营拖车上 他…… hooked up to our camping trailer, and he was...
说我们要走 saying we were leaving.
我们打算戒网 We were gonna go live off the grid,
像我们一直想要的那样 like we always wanted.
他非常兴奋 他…… He was more than excited, he was...
发疯了一样 manic.
叫我去收拾行李 Told me to go start packing.
只带必需品 Just the essentials.
“立刻 ” "Now."
你做了什么？ What did you do?
我惊慌失措 I panicked.
我进了科迪的房间 我说 I went into Cody's room and I said
我需要偷偷溜出去 给爸爸买一件特别的礼物 that I needed to sneak out to go get Dad a special present.
让儿子跟着 And would he come with me?
他认为这是一项特殊任务 He thought it was a special mission.
我们偷偷从厨房溜走 We snuck out through the kitchen,
穿过洗衣房 through the laundry room.
然后从后面出去 And then out the back.
我们几乎快上公路了 And we were almost at the freeway.
而他 And he...
截住了我们 把我撞倒 cut us off, and knocked me down,
然后… and...
他带了一把刀 He had a knife on him.
他刚开始用刀刺我 And he just started slashing me with it.
刺我 Slashing me with it.
然后科迪开始尖叫 And then Cody started screaming.
他放开了我… And he got up off me...
然后我的孩子不再叫了 And then my boy stopped screaming.
永远无法改变 Can't change that.
你还能听见那辆车的声音 You could hear the trucks there, too.
谢谢你 赛迪 Thank you, Sadie.
如果你们允许 我想为珍妮静默片刻 If it's okay with you, I would like to end this session by...
作为本次互助的结束 by taking a moment of silence for Janet.
所有死了的女人 都想出去吗 All the women that died, wanting out?
死了的男人 想出去吗 Men who died, wanting out?
女孩们… Girls...
男孩们…… Boys...
每个墓地全都是… Every graveyard is full...
没有撑过来的人 of people that didn't make it.
而你还幸存着 坐在这里 And you sit here, alive,
一无是处 and wasting.
这是对他们的不尊重 It's disrespectful to them.
对于今天要死的人 To the ones that are gonna die today,
以及明天要死的人 and gonna die tomorrow.
这是一场大屠杀 It's a massacre.
而你所能做的就是坐在这里看着儿童书籍 And all you can do is sit here and read kids' books.
你必须反击 You have to fight back.
即使… Even if...
即使这可能要你的命 Even if it kills you.
银行还在止赎吗 Is the bank still foreclosing?
两周后将出售房产 Sale's in two weeks.
在此之前你必须进去 You need to go in and get out
把你要取出的必需品拿走 any possessions you want before then.
好消息是 Good news is,
信用卡公司正在审查你的债务 credit card companies are reviewing your debt.
我相信这些债务会因为欺诈而被取消 I'm fairly confident it'll all get written off as fraud.
你知道他买的什么吗？ Do you know what he was buying?
主要是补贴抵押贷款 Mainly supplementing mortgage payments.
直到他们不再放贷 Until they cut him off.
那人寿保险呢 And the life insurance policy?
因为你丈夫失踪了 还没有证实死亡... Because your husband's missing, not confirmed dead...
他们还不会赔偿 they won't pay out.
嗯 Hmm.
我最好的选择应该是什么 What's my best option?
国家可以立即替你支付 From the state, I can get you an immediate payment
2500美元 of two-and-a-half grand.
作为你儿子的丧葬费 That's the cost of your son's funeral.
亲爱的贝弗莉小姐 Dear Miss Beverly,
请在阅读之后立即销毁这封信 please destroy this letter after you read it.
我知道自己这辈子的使命了 I know what I wanna do with my life.
我要帮助那些无法逃脱的人 I wanna use it to help people who can't escape.
我不会杀人 I won't kill.
但我会让他们迅速摆脱虐待 But I'll get them free from the abuse quickly.
且一劳永逸 And for good.
让我来抗争 不用他们 Let me fight, so they don't have to.
我会要求钱或食物作为报酬 I'll ask for cash or food in return,
只要他们有 whatever they can afford.
我希望有一天我再无需报酬 One day I hope not to ask for anything.
我大部分时间可能都会失去联系 I'll be out of contact most of the time,
但绝不是永远 but it won't be forever, either.
页面底部有说明 Instructions are at the bottom of the page.
我知道传递说明是有风险的 I know it's a risk to pass them on and I...
我不指望你能做到 I don't expect you to take it.
我曾经担心车水马龙会到永远 I used to be afraid that the trucks won't stop coming.
但现在 我欢迎每“一辆车” But now, I welcome every one.
感谢你们帮助过我 Thank you for helping me.
赛迪 Sadie.
我在树林里看见你 还以为你是个猎人 I saw you in the woods, I thought you were a hunter.
我跟着你…走了几英里 I followed you for... for miles.
我甚至不知道为什么 我只是... I don't even really know why, I just...
看到你像我们一样 把车藏起来 Even when I saw you hid the car the way we did...
我不确定了 I wasn't sure.
直到我看到你的脸 Until I saw your face.
原来是你 Saw my girl.
但我不知道 赛迪 But I don't know, Sades.
你还是我的女人吗 You still my girl?
你的头发怎么了 Why'd you do that to your hair?
嘿 Hey.
你需要喝点水 You need to drink some water.
你去过很多森林 赛迪 That's a lot of forest you covered, Sades.
你标记得很完美 You've marked it off perfectly.
你一直在找我？ You been looking for me?
我们要弄清楚 赛迪 We gotta figure out your head, Sades.
是你搞砸了一切 You messed it all up.
你的心还会痛 So, there is still a heart in you.
你是个坏娘们 You've been a bad person.
但没关系 But it's okay.
因为我现在来拯救你了 Because I got you back now.
我来救你了 赛迪 I got you back, Sadie.
我要去弄点吃的 I'm gonna go get us something to eat.
胡来 胡来 Wrong, wrong, wrong!
把手放在木头上 赛迪 Put your arm on the wood, Sades.
赛迪… Sadie...
把你的手放在木头上 Put your arm on the wood.
赛迪 Sadie!
不敢相信你竟然还活着 Still can't believe you're alive.
你得回家 赛迪 You gotta come home, Sades.
我爱你 I love you.
我无法自控 I can't help it.
就算如此… Even after all this...
我仍然爱你 I still love you.
我以为是因为你的爱 I thought it was love you had.
但事实并非如此 But it's not.
而是需要 It's need.
一种绝望的… Desperate...
变态的… perverted...
-需要 -赛迪 - need. - Sadie.
不 No.
我试图躲避 I tried to hide from it.
也想逃离 And then I tried to run from it.
现在... And now...
现在我要结束这一切 Now I'm gonna end it.
你得回家了 You're coming home.
你杀了我们的儿子 You killed our boy.
你逼我的 You made me!
是你逼我的 You made me do it!
你知道离开我 会有可怕的结果 You knew it'd be bad, leaving me.
但你还是选择离开 And you did it anyway.
你早就知道会有什么后果 You knew it'd be bad!
你逼我的… You made me...
你杀了我们的儿子… You killed our boy...
因为他看到了你的真面目 because he saw the truth of you.
你杀了我们的儿子 You killed our boy.
而现在 我要杀了你 And now, I'm gonna kill you.
很高兴收容所找到了你 Glad the shelter was able to find you.
为什么警察要找我？ Why did the police wanna see me?
警察可能找到了你丈夫的尸体 The police may have found your husband's body.
他们希望你去确认身份 And they want you to go in and identify it.
他怎么了？ And what happened to him?
他并非正常死亡 Well, the man did not die of natural causes.
但似乎也没有任何证据 But there doesn't seem to be any evidence.
考虑到他的重罪犯身份 And considering his felon status,
我怀疑警方是否会投入更多 I doubt they'll wanna put more effort
精力来继续进行调查 into solving the case.
如果真的是他 If it is him,
你得在2月份的第二周 you'll need to account for your whereabouts and schedule
做好安排 during the second week of February.
可以 I can do that.
好消息是 因为有了尸体 The good news is that with a body,
他的人寿保险会赔付 his life insurance pays out.
你有联络方式吗 Is there some way I can keep in contact with you?
电邮 电话号码？ Email, telephone number?
好的 我给你留个电子邮件吧 Yeah, I made you an email address.
我看着窗外 I'm looking out the window,
窗外车水马龙 and the trucks won't stop coming.
我是伊娃 格林伯格 My name is Eva Greenberg.
我住在402 I live at 402...